No I didn’t choose my career over my child

Hello lovelies,

Almost weekend and as a working mom that means really precious time with family. I am away from home from 7AM until 5.30PM so you can imagine how much I long for the weekend to come.

I’ve been reading quite a few blogs and Instagram posts lately about working moms who gave up their career to be a stay at home mom because their children were more important. If that means the rest of us who didn’t do so chose a career over our children then Houston, we have a problem.

Firstly this subject is a bit unrecognized to me because where I am from, moms go back to work after their maternity leave, period. I don’t know one mom back home who didn’t. The big difference is of course the length of the maternity leave which is much longer in Sweden than here.

Every mother chooses what to do depending on her own situation but to say a stay at home mom chose her children and a working mom her career it’s just wrong. Both are doing their best.

Setting an good example for Nilia is my number one goal in life. I also have worked hard for my career, it’s part of me and who I am. I am happiest when I know my career and personal life are both in place, it gives me a good feeling about myself. And that feeling is of course automatically transferred to Nilia. Happy woman = happy mom.

For me, it’s all about work-life balance, it all comes down to that. I was once asked what do I miss the most with Nilia because I am working fulltime and I thought about it and realized, nothing. I don’t miss anything because I am doing it all myself. I might be a full time working mom but I have a lot of efficient time with her because the time with her is limited and precious.

I grew up with a working mother myself. Do I for one second feel she wasn’t there for me or that my mother chose her career over me? Never. Instead she set the bar high and taught me it’s not a choice, you can have both and be excellent at both! And I am setting the exact same example for Nilia.

Did I cry myself to sleep for weeks before I started to work after my maternity leave? You bet I did. But I reminded myself this is all for her, this is all to set a life for her that I want her to have.

So no, working moms don’t choose their careers over their children, they are doing it for their children.

Love and respect to all mommies out there.


Nilia & Mommy